I am the best woman in the world! This good news was brought to me by an online jewellery platform and I am so delighted about it! I was also informed that treating myself on this momentous discovery of my womanhood is critical and I must buy a pair of earrings I do not need.
My fav online site is offering a 40% discount for women on… hold your breath… beauty and grooming! Because, what else could a woman possibly be looking for da! A little voice in my head whispers a protest to this tokenism of Women’s Day, but I’m quick to shush it.
Having the attention span of a goldfish, I move from offer to offer, as the world out there gets eager to reward me for being a woman. At a price of course. To buy or not to buy, that is the question.
Look at me now.
Struggling to choose between the red silk saree or the blue chikankari kurta. In a dilemma..! Should I book myself for the skin lightening treatment first or buy myself the weight loss package before that? The Mahilas of this world have never had so many choices.
From the choices bombarding my email hailing my womanhood, to the ones I am gripped by everyday… I may be empowered or not, I sure am busy.
Should I do nothing at home, like all housewives are supposed to be doing? Should I tell my office colleague I don't want to go out for that drink in the evening or should I just smile ? Should I yell at the sleazy uncle next door who eyes me every morning or should I ignore it like usual?
Should I pretend to like the 9 o clock show that I hate or refuse to pass the remote this time? Should I walk out of this relationship or continue for the sake of children ?
No time to think, let alone decide.
For this one decision taken two years ago, I had visited my favourite salon to cut my own long curly hair really short. The stylist asked me three times if my husband has allowed me to get a ‘boy cut’ before even beginning her work. I was feeling a little bad but everybody told me not to be so touchy.
So now I am not touchy at all! I’ve become a very happy person. #Feelingempowered. And so I’m even more excited for this woman’s day. What is this?! A 40% discount for me on the local gym membership. This is getting serious now. Must stop dreaming and start planning for the big day.
Facebook post with deep thoughts on the power of being a woman. Ready
Insta post with introspective selfie and Rumi quote on proud to being a woman. Oops.. can't find Rumi. Will manage with Rupi. Ready.
Whatsapp forwards establishing that hum kisise kam nahin. Ready.
Feeling in control now. This is what empowerment must feel like. Now to check out the beauty, jewellery, dresses, footwear, salon, dinner reservations…
Arre bhai, it’s the Day of the Mahilas. Celebrating women is important, no?